The last few days have been tedious to say the list, every little mishap that could happen; did happen. It took us a couple of days just to get to our next destination. Oklahoma City was not what I was expecting, it took some really good hits from the space rocks. The city is basically rubble at this point, we’re actually holed up at the Oklahoma City Zoo. I can’t explain it, maybe it’s the vibrancy and exotic nature of the life here, but it’s managing to hold back the growth. We’ve seen very little animal life though, most of them escaped into the wild when the rocks broke the habitats. One of the botanists in our convoy thinks that the massive variation of plant life here has made it difficult for the growth to adapt and quickly spread as every inch it comes across a new species that it has never had to absorb before. I on the other hand have no idea, and don’t intend to over think it, I’m just grateful we have a solid safe zone with some much needed supplies. The veterinary clinic here was fully stocked, the medics will have to play with the doses, but it all works on people too.
We’ve had a lot of equipment failures with the vehicles, could be the spores, could just be how hard we’re pushing them, could be a mixture, but we’re trying to fix the problem, I’ve been told it will take a couple of days if we don’t want to do this every hundred miles or so.
The worst thing of all is since we arrived here I’ve been getting these crazy dreams. They all start the same way, I woman calling for my help. I don’t know who she is, or where she is. I just hear her calling my name. Sometimes I see flashes of blue light, now and again I could have sworn that the light formed the shape of woman, but it’s hard to hold onto the memories of these dreams with the crippling migraines I’ve been waking up with. I haven’t felt anything like this since the first week of having my ocular implant installed, it’s so intense that it’s been giving me a fever for the first few hours when I wake up. The medics are really concerned, they can’t seem to figure out what is going on, they keep running tests, but nothing has come up with a conclusive answer. It’s been a couple of days of pain killers and cold packs. But they come regularly. As soon as a close my eyes I start to hear her, the light starts flashing. A few times it’s pulled me right out of sleep and I’m still hearing and seeing things for a few minutes.
At least I got a little bit of amusement when Ramirez nervously asked me to turn over my weapons. Probably a good call on his part, who knows what is happening to me, maybe I’m becoming a threat? Maybe I’m becoming one of those things out there? I don’t know, but if things start to look bad, I’ve ordered them to put me down long before that happens. I’m not giving up yet, but the plan still needed to be in place…
We’re not moving out until I start to feel better, I get periods of calm, like now, where I can write and think straight. But most of the time my thoughts are clouded, I’m irritable, and just downright miserable. It would really be some serious bullshit that after everything, this is my end; losing my mind to plant jizz…